Recent Jokes and Gift Images

• Today I gave my dead batteries away….Free of charge.
• Silence is golden, Duct tape is silver
• Q: Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed?
• Q: Why was there thunder and lightning in the lab?
• Q: Why was the student’s report card wet?
• Q: Why was the math book sad?
• Q: Why was the guy looking for fast food on his friend?
• Q: Why was the broom late?
• Q: Why should you take a pencil to bed?
• Q: Why is Basketball such a messy sport?
• Q: Why is a baseball team similar to a muffin?
• Q: Why is a 2016 calendar more popular than a 2015 calendar?
• Q: Why don’t you see giraffes in elementary school?
• Q: Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
• Q: Why does a hummingbird hum?
• Q: Why do watermelons have fancy weddings?
• Q: Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?
• Q: Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
• Q: Why do girls scouts sell cookies?
• Q: Why was the clock tower such a good storyteller?
• Q: Why did the bonsai tree get promoted?
• Q: Why did the robot water itself?
• Q: Why did the toaster become a sailor?
• Q: Why did the squirrel buy a motorcycle?
• Q: Why did the pancakes hide from the cat?
• Q: Why did the rabbit open a bakery?
• Q: Why don’t turtles rush through the forest?
• Q: Why did the tomato go to the family reunion?
• Q: What kind of cheese can fly?
• Q: Why did the bicycle refuse to argue?
• Q: Why did the bird replace the computer mouse?
• Q: Why did the coffee file for a name change?
• Q: Why did the duck invite a dog to the pool?
• Q: Why did the dog sit at the computer?
• Q: Why did the cat sit next to the pizza?
• Q: Why was the bread smiling at breakfast?
• Q: What programming language do sailors prefer?
• Q: Why did the bowling pin take the afternoon off?
• Q: Why did the banana bring a jar of jam to work?
• Q: What runs but can’t walk?
• Q: What never asks questions but receives a lot of answers?
• Q: What music are balloons scared of?
• Q: What kind of shoes do all spies wear?
• Q: What kind of lights did Noah use on the Ark?
• Q: What kind of key opens the door on Thanksgiving?
• Q: What kind of key opens a banana?
• Q: What kind of egg did the bad chicken lay?
• Q: Why do birds fly south for the winter?
• Q: Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance?
• Q: Why didn’t the 11 year old go to the pirate movie?