StopScrolling.com - A Pictures and Jokes Company

What fits your schedule better……Exercising 1 hour a day or being fat 24 hours a day?

What did the Super Nintendo say to the Sega Genesis?

A: “You know, everyone always tells me that I’m a bit better than you.”

Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was asalted.

Q: What did the blanket say to the bed?

A: Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered!

Today I gave my dead batteries away….Free of charge.

Silence is golden, Duct tape is silver

Q: Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed?

A: She couldn’t control her pupils!

Q: Why was there thunder and lightning in the lab?

A: The scientists were brainstorming!

Q: Why was the student’s report card wet?

A: It was below C level!

Q: Why was the math book sad?

A: Because it had too many problems.

Q: Why was the guy looking for fast food on his friend?

A: Because his friend said dinner is on me.

Q: Why was the broom late?

A: It over swept!

Q: Why should you take a pencil to bed?

A: To draw the curtains!

Q: Why is Basketball such a messy sport?

A: Because you dribble on the floor!

Q: Why is a baseball team similar to a muffin?

A: They both depend on the batter.

Q: Why is a 2016 calendar more popular than a 2015 calendar?

A: It has more dates.

Q: Why don’t you see giraffes in elementary school?

A: Because they’re all in High School!

Q: Why don’t skeletons fight each other?

A: They don’t have the guts.

Q: Why does a hummingbird hum?

A: It doesn’t know the words!

Q: Why do watermelons have fancy weddings?

A: Because they cantaloupe.